Bangles Are B*****s. (:

ok you guys might not get me here but what someone says is true. why give yourself and others stupid excuses? the actual truth is not all those reasons. and they are what they are, excuses. just to give it a go. i think thats good. that makes sense. but if it was me, i would say. sorry i not ready/ dont want to be in a relationship. or sorry but the space in my heart is taken. lols. which is true. [edit](i was just saying this as an example as in what i would say if i didnt like the guy that way . yeap.and/or if i liked someone else already (: ) i dont ask for being together. or having a special relationship. all i want is to get to know you, help you through times of need, listen to your rants, make you smile, make you laugh, get to know your world. what is it like? what do you like? its like an interview if you will. im sure ive said before, seeing people happy makes me happy. and sometimes, not just happy-happy. sometimes, i get the feeling that some people are just deceiving themselves. they havent found the meaning in life. they dont know what they want. they havent found true happiness. its all a facade. they arnt really laughing. they arnt really happy. empty laughters and false smiles. you can feel it, when they are laughing for the sake of laughing. its delusion. but please, do be truly happy. do what you want. go for it. your dreams. and by this i meant good things not devilish things. i've always wanted and try to do what i want. but sometimes if cant all be true because of life restrictions like, family and money. and also, good mental sense, responsibility and capability. i know it seems like i got over him really fast. but the truth is it happened over the course of our relationship. we may have only broken up nearly 2 months ago but the unhappiness,pain,shock i felt in sec 4 was unbearable. im not really strong, sher. you just didnt see me before. i may seem strong now but you didnt see how i crumbled. you didnt see the anger and sourness in my eyes. you didnt know the snakes in my tummy that were rolling all around all the time. but i rather you think im strong. cos i do hope you will be strong too. and i will be strong. i will i WILL. ****************************************************** okay enough of random thoughts. lets talk about what i did today so far. woke up at about 9plus today. wanted to sleep more but thought better not. played comp until abt 10 and called sher cos i know she'll be sleeping. hurhur. and im right lols. then dragged my gross self with gross hair down to school. slacked around at cheers and atrium munching then to library for some podcast magic. puked when i first heard me test test record voice. LOL. then did it properly. last part was best HEEHEE. but shit man i couldnt do it cos i was LAUGHING TOO FREAKING HARD TMAO. well i did start but i couldnt end then teresa prolly got sianed haha and she said it for me all while i was still laughing, hahaha. i totakky cant act nor record when there's things recording me. Haha. (: tm-ing was cancelled cos she took too long and it was getting late and i had to go eat eat. hee. yup. photos of neighbour's house i told you they moved. and and. just now when i went to the coffee shop to eat with my eldest sis, something damn funny happened along the way. we were walking and talking when this motorcyclist just sped past us and he was blasting indian music. then we were like. wa (cos it really was loud) and she shouted out: That doesn't sound good!! LOL. i wanted to roll over. haha. and then she added to me; 'polluting my soundscape..' hahaha. not meant as racism but mainly cos it was loud and he just sped past like that. talked as we ate. i do like talking to her (: